It’s only in an even-keep relationship that we can risk the vulnerability that deep intimacy requires.Few of us, however, are taught how to link passion and peace in our relationships, or how to cultivate the thrill of a brimming yet quiet heart.
You can even do it while waiting in a doctor’s office or when you’re on a bus or train.
You can do them alone, but I strongly encourage you to practice with your partner or, if you prefer, a close friend or family member.(MORE: Relationship Rescue: Bringing Back the Passion) Emotional Safety Is the Bedrock of Adventurous Intimacy "People who feel more attached aren’t just happier," says Craig Malkin, a professor of psychology at Harvard University School of Medicine, "they are more likely to seek such thrills as rock-climbing and parachute-jumping and to throw themselves into new situations and challenges, like meeting strangers and traveling overseas.”Why?
“Their sense of adventure may stem from a lust for life that security itself imparts,” Malkin says.
(Be aware, though, that you may feel very moved by this small but powerful process, so you might want to save it for a more private moment.) Feeling the Gifts and Wounds of Your Loved One Sit quietly in a place where you won’t be interrupted and think of your loved one. Remember how your partner’s face looks when he or she is gazing at you with love.
As we get older, however, melodrama becomes increasingly less acceptable, and compatibility and kindness begin to look more and more desirable. We can have and enjoy the deep thrills of romantic love and the comfort of stability at the same time.
Recent research has shown that emotional safety is actually the jumping-off point for love that’s as heady as it is healing.