Today I am incentivized not to be honest with my wife. If she could be real about why she wants the AG in our lives, I suppose she could see that it’s just about her anger.If she could be real about it we could come to some resolutions about how and when I could get caught up.Sincerely, October 28, 2016 | Categories: anger, divorce, money | Tags: anger issues, her anger, my ex-wife's anger, power and control, the AG's office, the attorney general's office, why she's mad at me, why she's still mad | Leave A Comment » The first reason is she thinks she’s been right the entire time. She’s going to have to tell the case worker why she’s being a dick. I’m also happy I have this outlet so I don’t take my frustrations out in some other way. To the AG’s office I say, “I will comply to the letter of the law, as I always have.” Sincerely, October 19, 2016 | Categories: anger, dad, divorce, money | Tags: attorney general's office, child support, child support issues, dealing with my angry ex, dealing with the AG's office, my angry ex, my ex-wife, non-custodial parent, the AG's office | 1 Comment » There should not be so much anger six years after my divorce. I am in the process of applying for a lot of jobs these days. Somewhere, somehow, she believed she was working in the best interest of her kids.She was right about investigating the divorce before ever mentioning it to me or our couple’s therapist. She was right when she filed against me with the AG’s office. Perhaps she’s right to be mad at me still, six years later. She and her husband have been talking to me about the AG’s office. The term was brought into use when referring to a new girlfriend’s mean ex. And recently, with a financial institution, they let me know a credit check would be part of the final approval of me as an employee. I had been talking to a friend who worked for the AG’s office (still does) at that time.She has plenty she could be mad at me about, I guess. And she could be convinced that her life would be much happier if she just had the money. But if it is, she should be telling me she’s mad at me about the money. Dads who are trying to cut out on their kids or their obligations. Not because she thinks they will get the money any sooner, because they won’t.But let’s talk about how it manifests itself in our life. Not because she thinks I’m going to try to get out of my obligation, because I won’t and I can’t. She was mad at me for the last year of my marriage to her. She wasn’t telling me she was mad, or what she was mad about, she’d just occasionally blurt out, “Fuck You.” And what’s going on six years after our divorce is not much different. And my ex-wife thinks that having them in our lives is a good idea. When we were married she started letting it out sideways.
I shouldn’t tell her anything and just let them deal with the account. The other, the obsessive hate, is corrosive to everything and everyone around you.
She harbors some convoluted thinking that allows her to feel justified and righteous about them. And somehow, some way, my ex-wife thinks it’s a good idea. Unfortunately my kids live in that environment 70% of the time. At 13 and 15 I find them charming, well-balanced, and loving kids. There’s some sort of power and control going on here, even now. She wants to make sure I don’t try to skip out on the AG’s payments when I get my new job? I told my ex-wife I would be getting behind while we looked for new clients.
But really she’s just mad and extracting her pound of flesh. She knows that sending her new husband to meet with me rather than meet with me herself is a dickish and cowardly move. In our child support negotiations it’s only going to be me and her and the AG employee. My ex-wife is “happily” remarried and yet still somehow furious with me. A great example of the game she’s still playing happened last week. She waited exactly two months before filing against me with the AG’s office.
Several years ago, when I started getting behind on my child support payments, my ex-wife filed our “case” with the attorney general’s office. No, she’s keeping the AG’s office on my ass because she’s mad the AG’s office give her the illusion of power and control over me.
If we could get the AG’s office out of our relationship we would both have options beyond what we have today.
But one thing is for sure, I will die of starvation if I ever want to hear a kind word, or a word of thanks from my ex-wife. One of the concerns we all share has to do with paying for college for two kids. Do I need an outlet for this rage that comes up when she pulls one of her dickish moves? Well, since my ex-wife sent my ass up river to the Attorney General’s office there’s a nifty little red flag on my credit report that says I’m a deadbeat dad. I told her, “They do not provide the service you are thinking of. Bringing them in is only going to complicate things.” She filed anyway.